托福写作中的单词问题一直是困扰许多学生的关键问题之一。虽然大多数考生经过一段时间的训练可以更好地防止写作中的基本单词问题,但要提高单词的质量,写一些独特、真实、水平的单词并不容易。这不仅取决于词汇的积累,而且与考生的单词应用能力有很大关系。下面的托福写作老师将结合案例给你一个具体的解释。
托福写作提高用词质量,改写实例分析
1.Original:We know that sometimes success is measured by how much money you earn.
Revised:It does not surprise us to discover that sometimes success is measured in terms of the money you earn.
评价:know是一个非常初级的词汇,作文中出现了II believe that,I know that的表达只能体现考生写作技巧的不成熟。使用ithat只能反映考生的写作技巧。 does not surprise us to discover that更换We know that并没有改变原话的含义,而是立刻为整个句子增添了亮点。
2.Original:We all know that most factories would be of no use if there were not clean water supply.
Revised:It goes without saying that most factories would be of no use if there were not clean water supply.
托福写作评价:与上例一样,know等初级词汇应避免在作文中使用,It goes without saying that是一种固定的结构,意思是“不言而喻”。它经常被用来引用或解释作文中众所周知的事实。类似的表达方式有:
An old saying goes that
Proverb goes that
It is universally acknowledged that
It is generally accepted that
3.Original:Some other people think that people should read extensively.
Revised:Another position says that people should read extensively.
评价:与know一样,think也应尽量避免使用,修改后的句子是用Another position says that代替think提出另一种观点,也可以使用hold a point of view,hold the 更换像opinion这样的句子。
4.Original:The unexpected win of the match give us confidence.
Revised:The unexpected win of the match boost our confidence.
评价:give也是英语中最初级、最基本的词汇,也是中国学生最喜欢在托福独立写作中使用的词汇。这个词只意味着“给予,给予”这个动作,不涉及动作的特点和状态。如果说增加信心,增强斗志,那就更地道了。 confidence/morale,如:The change of management has boosted morale throughout the company. 管理模式的变化鼓舞了整个公司的士气。
5.Original:The use of drugs has increased greatly in the last ten years.
Revised:The use of drugs has increased significantly in the last ten years.
评价:greatly是一个普通的术语,表达程度高,“非常,非常”,使用相当普遍,没有新意。在托福独立写作中,应尽量避免使用这些流行而陈旧的词汇,并应该使用一些更正式、更有说服力的词语。比如significantly表示已经达到了至关重要或可观的水平,“重要而可观”可以具体说明药物的使用,增长幅度很大。significantly也可以换成considerably、tremendously等。,这也有很好的表达效果。